


Matched.

by the1975s



Category: Produce 101 (TV), Wanna One (Band)
Genre: Crack, Humor, M/M, Onghwang, Sexting, Sexual innuendos, Social Media
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-22
Updated: 2018-01-07
Packaged: 2018-12-05 09:06:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 10,064
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11574870
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/the1975s/pseuds/the1975s
Summary: Minhyun is not interested in boning dicks but then Ong Seongwoo and Tinder happened.





	1. not interested.

**Author's Note:**

> warning: lower case intended !!! so this is basically texting + povs but mostly chat conversations.

do you ever feel like you just got hit by a truck repeatedly? or a big rock falling over you? minhyun feels both physically and mentally. working in a cafe after school makes his life even worse. 

his friends think that minhyun has been drowning himself with too much work and school, and so he was dragged by his friends to their usual bar after his shift. he has a good alcohol tolerance but being out the whole day drained him so much that he decided to lay down on his bed without taking of his shoes anymore. momentarily closing his eyes, almost drifting to dreamland way too fast, he felt his phone vibrate from his pockets. 

groaning loudly, he fishes out his phone from his pockets with his eyes still closed. he releases another tired sigh as he opens his eyes and squint closely at this phone. his screen is full of notifications, from _tinder_ , making him sit up right and stare at his phone for a minute. he did not remember installing the dating app, he wasn't even interested in dating. 

how the hell did it happen? 

_minki_ , he sneers. he swears minki is dead meat once he sees him. the sudden flashback of minki borrowing his phone at the bar and after 10 minutes, he returns it with a smile and sheepishly said, "thank me later". his friends had been pressuring him to date, saying it'll be good for him but minhyun has been turning them down ever since. 

cursing softly as he unlocks his phone, ready to uninstall the foolish app, a message popped up. he can't help but notice that a _guy_ messaged him on tinder. minki probably set his interest to both male and female, even though minhyun made it clear that he was straight as a ruler. opening the app, he saw he already has 50 matches and 43 messages. both from male and female. 

his attention drifted to the most recent message which was 1 minute ago. it's from a guy named _seongwoo_. 

**seongwoo** 1m.  
i jeongmanl jinjja wanjeon real heol dae.... 

curiosity hitting him, he opens the message, frowning upon the long message he got from the guy. clicking on seongwoo's profile, the guy was undeniably good looking. minhyun can't deny that the seongwoo guy has an actor face, he'll give him that. stopping himself from getting a tad bit interested in the foolish app, minhyun was about to uninstall the app when he received a message from the seongwoo guy again. his brows knitted yet again, after reading the guy's message. he scoffs loudly and decides to reply but he swears he'll uninstall the app after. 

  
  


**seongwoo**  
hey i know youre admiring my pictures but you can at least reply to me, man. 

**minhyun**  
lmao. why would i admire pictures of a trash? 

**seongwoo**  
wow for a pretty boy like u, ure really rude.  
ch*ke. 

**minhyun**  
sorry, man. i'm not interested in choking. 

**seongwoo**  
issok at least ure interested in dicks 

**minhyun**  
ummm, no. 

**seongwoo**  
lol. sure. then why did u tick off the 'interested in male' ?? 

**minhyun**  
my friend did it. 

**seongwoo**  
*pretends to be shocked*

**minhyun**  
ya !! i'm not lying  
i swear i did not.  
why would i be interested. lol 

**seongwoo**  
yknow. youre making it sound like it was a gross thing to be interested  
in the same sex.  
thnx man, u ruined my mood.

**minhyun**  
ph shit.  
listen,  
i idid not mean it.  
im sorry. im just, tired. 

**seongwoo**  
hmmm.  
so u are interested?

**minhyun**  
no, sorry. but you're handsome, i'll give u that. 

**seongwoo**  
um thanks ?  
u know....

**minhyun**  
what? 

**seongwoo**  
u can stop playing hard to get. i know ure interested in dicks  
and so does boning mine :D

**minhyun**  
oh my god. listen, seongwoo, 

**seongwoo**  
i'm listening, daddy..

**minhyun**  
wait what- i choked. 

**seongwoo**  
i thought u werent interested in choking?  
daDDY.

**minhyun**  
omf sTOP CTFU 

**seongwoo**  
hahahaha

**minhyun**  
ok u know what nVM  
im going to sleep. 

**seongwoo**  
aw leaving already? :(  
goodnight daddy. it was kinda nice talking to u 

**minhyun**  
kinda???? nd stop with the daddy, jfc. 

**seongwoo**  
ok fine, bye bitchass 

**minhyun**  
drop that. wTF 

**seongwoo**  
i thought u were going to sleep, bitchass 

**minhyun**  
i was buT U WERE CALLING ME INAPPROPRIATE NAMES 

**seongwoo**  
yea sure. i know u just cant stop talking to a cool guy like me 

**minhyun**  
gross. bye seongwoo. 

**seongwoo**  
yea dream of me, bITCHASS, 

**seongwoo**  
and btw, ur bio is real cute.  
but ur pics are even better. 

  
  


********************************************** 

  



	2. pick (me) up lines.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Seongwoo tries to pursue Minhyun to stay through lame pick up lines.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank the internet for the lame pick up lines.

minki has always been the brightest within minhyun's group of friends. he is the life of the party and everyone around him adores him. you can't hate on choi minki, never.

except for hwang minhyun.

minhyun abhors minki the moment he woke up and after reading seongwoo's messages. he detests minki after putting such vulgar words on his tinder profile, which, was a lie. he immediately calls minki through the phone with a black look smothered across his pretty face. minki picks up the call after the third ring and minhyun wasted no time letting the former speak.

"ya choi minki! you're dead as meat" 

minki was flustered for a few seconds before giving out an amused response. "what? no good morning? good morning to you too minhyunie"

minhyun growls from the other line. "don't play dumb with me minki. i know what you did to my phone. and seriously? you know i dont have a small pen-" minhyun's outburst was cut off when minki started laughing hysterically, almost choking on his own laugh. "you're a devil" minhyun claims.

after a minute of trying to calm himself down, minki releases a slow laugh. "you like what i did? told you you'll be really thankful!" he chirps. if minhyun could wrap his hands around minki's pretty little neck right now, he would. but of course, violence is never an answer so he plans on scaring any men that would attempt to approach minki.

"oh fuck off, minki." minhyun mutters.

minki releases a laugh again that's making minhyun's blood boil. "whatever, minhyun. anyway, met someone interesting yet? any girl or guy yet?"

"none." he immediately answers.

minki scoffs "don't shit with me, sweetheart." 

"alright fine i talked to this guy-"

"a guy! a GUY! a human with a dick!"

"shut up. let me finish" minhyun interjects. "anyway, it's just a guy but after this call i'm gonna deactivate my tinder because i don't need it" minhyun says firmly. "bye." minhyun drops the call before minki can say anything. he doesn't want his morning to be ruined a lot more. 

he opened his tinder account and saw he still got a few new messages he did not bother reading. opting to ignore seongwoo's message, he went to the app's settings and was about to deactivate his account when a message from seongwoo appeared on his notification tab. yet again, seongwoo managed to stop him before he deactivates and it's bothering minhyun, a tad bit.

 

 **seongwoo**  
hey are u ignoring me tf  
after everything last night?  
i thought we had something, medium small penis guy!

**minhyun**  
gross. and take that back.

 **seongwoo**  
oh finally, he speaks !  
and what take that back???

**minhyun**  
dont believe what my bio says. my friend hacked my phone last night. 

**seongwoo**  
dOn'T bElIeVe WhAt My BiO sAyS. mY fRiEnD hAcKeD mY pHoNe LaSt NiGhT.

**minhyun**  
oh my gpd. whatever, im deactivating this. it was nice knowing u, bro. 

**seongwoo**  
WHAT  
YO  
WAIT  
WHAT THE FLIP  
dADDY  
BITCHASS  
I MEAN, MINHYUN  
wait  
I HAVE SOMETHING TO TELL U

**minhyun**  
what. hurry, i want this account gone. 

**seongwoo**  
did you just fart? because you blow me away !!!

**minhyun**  
that's so dinosaurs era wtf. 

**seongwoo**  
are you wifi?  
cause we have a great connection?

**minhyun**  
seriously are u still living in friendster era??? wt f bro im out 

**seongwoo**  
no actually wait  
are you the year 2017? because i wanna pull out of you  
and make 2018 come.

**minhyun**  
pls..... i dont want this torture anymore  
let me leave  
what do u want from me  


**seongwoo**  
i want  
u  
**seongwoo**  
to stay  
because u seem fun  
i dont have anyone to talk to :/

**minhyun**  
mmmgod stop lyin why the fuck u lyin 

**seongwoo**  
im not lying though

**minhyun**  
shut up seongwoo.  
it's impossible esp when  
uh  
ur bio is funny  
yea  


**seongwoo**  
really  
is that all or  
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

**minhyun**  
yea.  
anw im leaving have a good day  


**seongwoo**  
no  
ure the only guy here that isnt a suck up  
everyone wants to succ my glorious d  
and

**minhyun**  
tmi  
enough  


**seongwoo**  
ya stay  
what should i do to make u stay

**minhyun**  
seongwoo, 

**seongwoo**  
u want pickuplines? ok im on it

**minhyun**  
what no wAIT 

**seongwoo**  
are u an instagram pic bcs i would double tap  
u all night

 **seongwoo**  
are u katana?  
because ure looking pretty sharp !

 **seongwoo**  
if i were a watermelon, would u spit and swallow my own seeds?

 **seongwoo**  
are you minhyun?  
because damn idk i just want to pick u up

**minhyun**   
fUCK PLS STOP  
im leaving for real.  


**seongwoo**  
minhyun,  
i cant remember my phone number, can i have yours?  
sorry i just need someone i can call to talk in moments of  
panic and uncertainty who can remind me that  
there is still some basic humanity left in this world. 

**minhyun**  
ok. if that helps you sleep at night  


**seongwoo**  
i  
wait wHAT  
hOLY SHIT MAN  
hOLY SHIT DADDY 

**minhyun**  
lol  
just dont call me daddy.  
anw here's my number  
*************** 

**seongwoo**  
alright minhyunie oppa~ im gonna save it now

**minhyun**  
gross. okay bye, 

_you can no longer send a message to this person_

 

 

it was true, minhyun thought seongwoo was amusing despite how nasty the tinder stranger was. he thought he could use another friend but nothing more than that, he swears to himself. and it's inevitable to avoid the guy especially when they actually study in the same place.

unbeknownst to him, a soft smile was evident on his lips. his smile widen when he receives an unknown text on his imessage. the stranger's text was a dead giveaway especially when it starts off with a really lame pickup line that actually makes minhyun snigger.

 **unknown** hi are you a bank loan?  
cause u have my interest 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this was a mess and practically lame. im gonna deck my self skalsa  
> anw thanks for the comments n kudos, im glad my dry humor got yall  
> and tinder days are over :( just like that. no more hideous profiles, im sorry.


	3. cereal or milk.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Seongwoo wants to test whether him and Minhyun are meant for each other, so he asks "Do you pour the cereal or the milk first?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this cereal and milk debate is so 2016 but whatever.

it's been a week since minhyun and seongwoo have been casually texting each other. by casually, in a way that seongwoo constantly pesters minhyun on a daily basis. minhyun on the other hand blocked seongwoo's number five times already but the former can't resist unblocking him the next day or so. 

minhyun learned that seongwoo's an acting major. the acting major's building is quite far from his building. the photography building is two department buildings away from the acting department, so the possibility of meeting each other is quite impossible. seongwoo once asked minhyun to meet him at a cafe near the university, since he wanted to meet his new _bestfriend_ , according to him, in person. minhyun refuses to and added that seongwoo is far from being his bestfriend. 

for the entire week, minhyun's friends noticed how minhyun is always on his phone or how he always glances at his phone whenever they drink or eat together. they would often tease him, knowing minhyun has been anticipating seongwoo's text messages every minute. the younger shrugs off their teasing remarks by scowling at them and stating, "he's just a friend. we've only been talking for a week so quit it you asshats."

"okay gramps, no need to be grumpy" dongho mumbles.

"but you find him interesting, don't you?" jonghyun teases making minhyun rolls his eyes for the umpteenth time that day. minhyun reminds himself to never tell anything to his friends ever again, or he has to suffer their constant teasing. 

teasing him and meddling themselves into his life became his friends' new sort of entertainment and he chose to blame seongwoo for being humorously interesting.

********************************************** 

  
  
**ong shitwoo**  
hey bestfriend !!  
good morning

**minhyun**  
morning, 1 week friend. 

**ong shitwoo**  
bestfriend**

**minhyun**  
1 week friend. 

**ong shitwoo**  
bestfriend******

**minhyun**  
1 week friend. (2) 

**ong shitwoo**  
bestfriend (n): what minhyun is to seongwoo other  
than being his daddy sexy piece male friend bitchass  
hottie from photography that has a small penis  
with big personality.

**minhyun**  
1 week friend. (3)  
oh nd shut up, thnx. 

**ong shitwoo**  
ihy.

**minhyun**  
the feeling is mutual. 

**ong shitwoo**  
ouch :((  
rejection for breakfast ! i love it.  
what are u having for breakfast

**minhyun**  
cereal. 

**ong shitwoo**  
oh  
i have a question  
this would determine  
our  
um  
friendship

**minhyun**  
i dont want a friendship. no thank u. 

**ong shitwoo**  
ohmygod  
ure such a tsundere can u not.  
anw shut up and answer me  
this is a question between life and death

**minhyun**  
dramatic, as always.  
but fine what is it  


**ong shitwoo**  
stFU  
ANW  
do u pour the cereal first or the milk?

**minhyun**  
not this question again, im out. 

**ong shitwoo**  
why do u keep on leaving me  
istg im gonna glue u next to me  
when we meet

**minhyun**  
that is absolutely terrifying.  
being glued to you is a living nightmare.  


**ong shitwoo**  
why ??? do ??? u ??? keep ??? hurting ??? me ???  
this ??? way ???

**minhyun**  
deal with it :) 

**ong shitwoo**  
ure lucky im a masochist  
i could live up to this kind of relationship, daddy

**minhyun**  
istg u and ur kinks  
is going to be the cause of my death  


**ong shitwoo**  
oh ???  
so ure saying there's a possibility  
u might die if i choke u

**minhyun**  
NO WTF  
I WANT A PEACEFUL MORNING BUT U RUINED IT  
WITH UR KINKS  


**ong shitwoo**  
lmao chill baby  
bro***

**minhyun**  
....... 

**ong shitwoo**  
anw abt the cereal milk thing ???  
can u pls answer it  
it's for my thesis. thnx.

**minhyun**  
cereal first. 

**ong shitwoo**  
FRIENDSHIP OVER.  
MINHYUN CANCELLED.  
explain !

**minhyun**  
ure already giving me a headache  
this early  


**ong shitwoo**  
i can give u a different head...  
kind of way....  
if u want.......

**minhyun**  
YOU ARE HONESTLY DISGUSTING, BRO.  


**ong shitwoo**  
haha i know u want it

**minhyun**  
....  
anw  
i chose cereal bcs anyone who pours milk first  
is a cereal killer.  
if you put milk in first,  
the cereal's gonna float and the cereal-to-milk  
ratio is ruined. im not a dumbass  


**ong shitwoo**  
are u trying to say im a dumbass  
excuse me  
ITS DEFINITELY MILK FIRST.  
WHERE HAVE U BEEN LIVING? UNDER A CAVE???

**minhyun**  
u r definitely a dumbass though.  
i have a point, shut it.  
think about it, it's cereal first.  
not milk.  


**ong shitwoo**  
i like mine with more milk  
so it's definitely milk first  
and im not a dumbass.  
im an intellectual.

**minhyun**  
in the law of science (matters)  
it's always solid before liquid  
r u a cat??? to pour milk first???  


**ong shitwoo**  
i can be a cat to you  
;)

**minhyun**  
for the umpteenth time, i am not  
into any kinks, milk boy.  


**ong shitwoo**  
milk boy....  
i would love to call u cereal boy back  
but  
i'd love to call u mine instead

**minhyun**  
no thanks.  
i cant be with someone who pours milk first.  


**ong shitwoo**  
shut up. that's why i called it a test of friendship  
bcs we still have to trust each other aFTER CHOOSING  
DIFFERENT SIDES

**minhyun**  
um  
who u?  


**ong shitwoo**  
WTF  
I HOPE U CHOKE ON UR CEREAL !


	4. choi minki.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Minhyun did not block Seongwoo because he was jealous. Definitely not.

**ong shitwoo**  
  
big mood 

**minhyun**  
im seriously disgusted…  
bRO 

**ong shitwoo**  
huh i wonder when will i get out of this bro zone (((  


**minhyun**  
we just met like 2 weeks ago wys

********

********

****  
** **

**ong shitwoo**  
i know but it feels like we've known each other for a year  


**minhyun**  
ure really that bored to bother me aren't u 

********

********

********  
**ong shitwoo**  
no  
anw so why did ur “friend” set u up on tinder  
****

**minhyun**  
what’s with those quotation marks  
hes real, excuse me. His name is minki and  
he is a devil in disguise

 **ong shitwoo**  
ok prove it

 **minhyun**  
what is there to prove ??? the 

**ong shitwoo**  
u must be lying  
istg ****  
hey why are you leaving me on read !!!  
yO  
MINDADDY  
THE DISRESPECT ???  
MY SALAD DOESNT DESERVE THIS  


**minhyun**  
HEYYA SEONGWOO THISS IS MINKI AND I QUICKLY GRABBED MINHYUNS  
PHONE AND HES DEFINITELY GLARING AT ME NOW  
SHIT  
GOOD THING DONGHOS HERE 2HOLD HIMD DOWN  
ANW B4 HE GETS MEEE  
MINHYUN SAID URE GOOD LOOKING  
WE SHOULD HHAVE COFFEE SOMETIMES  
ANW I MADE MINHYUN TINDER BCS HE DOESN’T HAVE TIMW FOR  
RELATIONSHIPS  
IM EVEN SURE HES STILL A VIRGIN  
SO IF U DON’T MIND CAN U PLS  
DJSKSKS  
JREKEE  
BSE Y  
kasjk 18273 skadsd fa 

**ong shitwoo**  
um minki ??? u okay??  
what should I do??  
what were u talking abt??

**minhyun**  
stupid minki.  
anyway don’t believe everything he says

 **ong shitwoo**  
huh where is minki ??? what did u do to him

**minhyun**  
tied him tf down. i bribed dongho it worked

 **ong shitwoo**  
damn minhyun  
lol u seem like a fun bunch  
esp minki

 **minhyun**  
don’t get deceived bro

 **ong shitwoo**  
minki sounds like fun  
i would love to talk to him again  
whats his number?? im sure he wont mind

_read._

  
**ong shitwoo**  
???? hey minhyun tf  
yo daddy  
baby boy u still there ??

**minhyun**  
here have his number  
*************  
im sure he wouldn’t bore u like i do  
have fun bro

 **ong shitwoo**  
thanks bro! ure the best

 **minhyun**  
Tch.

  
minhyun was utterly vexed. he glares at his friends who was teasing him for being jealous of minki and that seongwoo has taken an interest on minki. he was also annoyed how seongwoo pretty much ignored nor did not bother correcting him from stating that he's a bore. 

so minhyun really does bore seongwoo, who wouldn't, honestly? he thought. he figures seongwoo finds him dull due to his constant rejection towards seongwoo. he ponders how seongwoo tolerated him the whole time. 

he ignores the continuous tease coming from his friends as he switches his gaze to his phone. sighing, he puts his phone on his pocket and heads to the kitchen. as he rummages through the fridge, he hears jonghyun behind him.

"are you mad?" 

minhyun calmly replies, "nope"

"are you jealous?"

minhyun quickly turns around to give jonghyun a horrified look but his ears were red, giving jonghyun an answer as minhyun denies it. "jealous? what? the hell no." minhyun quickly chugs down a bottle of beer, avoiding jonghyun's pinning gaze.

jonghyun scoffs. "then why are your ears so red?"

minhyun empties the bottle and sets it into the counter with jonghyun waiting for his answer, who was leaning calmly against the wall.

"drop it, jonghyun. that's just disgusting" he says as he walks out of the kitchen, leaving jonghyun chuckling, having his friend all figured out.  
  
  


********************************************** 

**ong shitwoo**  
yo minhyunie

**minhyun**  
who gave u the right to call me minhyunie  


**ong shitwoo**  
minki said to call you that  


**minhyun** oh so ure really talking to him???  


**ong shitwoo**  
yea hes really funny minhyunie  


**minhyun**  
lol ok  
so stop bothering me now if u  
already found a boy toy  


**ong shitwoo**  
aw my baby  
so cold  
are u jealous?  
and he is not a boy toy  
im only loyal to u  


**minhyun**  
where did u get that disgusting idea.  
fuck off  


**ong shitwoo**  
minhyunie _not delivered_  
wait what _not delivered_  
did u block me kasjkajd shit _not delivered_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> idk what the heck am i doing while writing this but i apologize for the late update !!!  
> ad also for making minhyun petty kasjdkad
> 
> onghwang is rising, bless all the onghwang authors out there.  
> the comments and kudos are always loved, my eyes are sweating with joy.  
> ily all ksdjk yall can hmu on [twitter](https://twitter.com/95VlSUALS)!


	5. birthday rex.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's Minhyun's birthday, what are his friends up to?

**devil**  
when are you planning to unblock your lover boy

**minhyun**  
who??? 

**devil**  
ure already dumb  
but pls dont play even DUMBER  
ong's been bugging me to tell u  
to UNBLOCK HIS "precious ass"

**minhyun**  
u brought that problem upon urself  
not my problem anymore.  


**devil**  
u stubborn petTY HEADASS  
stop bitching  
i know ure still jealous of me  
but jFC SEONGWOO'S ACTING LIKE U BROKE UP WITH HIM  
i had to bring a tub of ice cream over his house  
and we watched NOTEBOOK for five times im gonna  
nECK MYSEL F !!!

**minhyun**  
let him be  
he has u anw  
you've been into his house even  
u're all buddies now i see  


**devil**  
tF HOW OLD ARE YOU AGAIN ???  
are u 5??? im so done.

********************************************** 

**Minki's Bitches** (5) 

**Bow Down Peasants**  
YALL  
IM SO DONE WITH MINHYUN

 **$exY B4ndit**  
lmao im already done w him  
a long time ago

**petty princess**  
@ me next time :) 

**bugi tonight**  
kids, stop bullying minhyun

 **(A)IRON MAN**  
kIdS sToP bUlLyInG mInHyUn

 **bugi tonight**  
OH ARON U'RE ALIVE  
and u finally appeared just to mock me.  
get out.

 **$exY B4ndit**  
aron LMAO

 **(A)IRON MAN**  
so i heard, our minhyun's  
whipped???

**petty princess**  
ARON HYUNG  
SAVE ME FROM THESE IDIOTS 

**(A)IRON MAN**  
not until u unblock your man

**petty princess**  
the heck???  
i hate yall. 

**Bow Down Peasants**  
ugh. what a drama queen.

**petty princess**  
excuse me??? 

**$exY B4ndit**  
you are excused, princess.

**petty princess**  


**bugi tonight**  
can we talk about a more important matter  
and that is 

**Bown Down Peasants**  
but this is! an important matter?!

 **bugi tonight**  
shut up minki.  
anw, as i was saying  
minhyun's birthday is coming

 **(A)IRON MAN**  
so?

 **$exY B4ndit**  
it's just a normal day.

**petty princess**  
are u always forgetting that im fucking here. in the gc.  
u morons 

**A(IRON MAN**  
do u hear that guys?  
i can hear a cricket from the distance.

 **$exY B4ndit**  
KJDAKDALDAFL

 **Bown Down Peasants**  
IMASKA WLKAKDSFNKSF

 **bugi tonight**  
KIDS. SHUT UP.

_read_

**bugi tonight**  
ok so, back to the important topic.  
we all should head out for a drink in your birthday  
minhyun

**petty princess**  
no thanks. id rather spend some alone time. 

**$exy B4ndit**  
psh. party pooper.

 **Bow Down Peasants**  
you're such a killjoy

 **(A)IRON MAN**  
we promise we wont bother u with your lover b-  
seongwoo anymore. juST PLEASE.  
IVE BEEN IN AN ALCOHOL DROUGHT FOR TOO LONG

**petty princess**  
now im interested... ok. my treat. 

**Bow Down Peasants**  
wait what  
but

 **bugi tonight**  
shut up minki  
that's good minhyun  
do u want me to call the other guys too?

**petty princess**  
sure. it's been awhile anyway 

**$exY B4ndit**  
THAT'S WHAT IM TALKING ABOUT.  
IM STOKED  
wait  
when's your birthday again....

 **bugi tonight**  
dongho...

 **(A)IRON MAN**  
baekho...

 **Bow Down Peasants**  
Kang...

**petty princess**  
YOU'RE NOT INVITED U RAT  


  
  


********************************************** 

  
  
it's been awhile since minhyun went out for a drink with his friends during friday nights. now that his preliminary exams are done, tonight was a perfect way to celebrate his little freedom and his 22nd birthday. changing his university shirt to a pink buttoned up polo paired with black jeans, he gives himself a satisfied smile as he checks himself on the mirror, ignoring how the bags underneath his eyes are quite evident.

he never put any effort on making himself look good, but tonight, he felt like it. he felt like he needed to make himself look good, it's his special day anyway. 

it was 20 minutes before 8pm, and he already received a message from minki asking about his whereabouts. 

 

 **devil**  
WHERE TF ARE U BIRTHDAY BOY

**minhyun**  
hold the fuck up ??? i'm not even late yet, u dumbass 

**devil**  
i know but ALL THE BOYS ARE ALREADY HERE  
bring ur flat ass over here !!  
i wanna get drunk already

**minhyun**  
ASSH 0LE  
oh wait, im gonna be late  
i have cats to feed first 

**devil**  
u don t even have cats u stUPID F UCK  
hurry up, dongho's already drinking !!!

**minhyun**  
whatever sure omw, princess. 

********************************************** 

  
minhyun arrived at the bar a minute late but he's not worried about minki bitching on him when he arrives. reluctantly heading over to his friends' usual spot, he immediately spots his friends crowding over the bar's counter. he spots the other familiar boys that finally made time to show up on his birthday. one of his friends, youngmin, immediately spots him. waving his hands and smiling widely at minhyun, minhyun took large steps as he brotherly hugs youngmin upon reaching the smaller guy. the boys cheered the moment minhyun arrived. 

after greeting youngmin, he moved next to hyunbin - giving him a fist bump they usually do before. after hyunbin was sewoon, then seungcheol and lastly, donghyun. he gives a nod to his 4 other friends while minki started to nag on how _late_ he is which made minhyun roll his eyes in return. 

the party started with the guys singing and wishing him a happy birthday followed by a few shots of vodka, and beer for some. a small smile played along the birthday boy's lips, completely forgetting about the guy he met on tinder for awhile. truth be told, seongwoo has been on his mind lately especially after blocking him and haven't been talking to him for a week already. he wasn't jealous of minki nor attracted to seongwoo. he barely knows the guy, for goodness' sake. he doesn't swing both ways, he never will. 

getting frustrated on his confused thoughts, he immediately downed his drink and asked for a refill. jonghyun approached him with worry etched on his face whilst placing a hand on minhyun's shoulders.

"what's up with the long face birthday boy?" jonghyun asks. minhyun shrugs. "nothing, don't worry about it, hyunnie." 

just in time, minki approaches with a wild look on his face. "what are you two doing here?! you're missing out aron and dongho doing a dance battle in the middle of the crowd over there!" he shouts over the loud music. jonghyun laughs after hearing what his friends are up to.

"seriously, i have to record that for future blackmail!" jonghyun exclaims, immediately making a beeline towards the dance floor leaving a chuckling minhyun and minki.

minki leans over to minhyun's ear, whispering something that made minhyun deepen his frown. "don't worry, your present is coming."

"huh?" minhyun confusedly asks. minki just gave him a wink as he leaves minhyun on his stool. shrugging off minki's strange behavior, minhyun continues to finish his drink. he was too lazy to get up and watch the dance battle happening between his best friends. he could just watch it when he's sober enough, knowing jonghyun filmed it for future blackmail. lost in his thoughts, he did not notice a guy taking up the seat beside him.

"hey bitchass" a deep yet warm voice greeted him and sent shivers down his spine. minhyun thought he was too drunk, even imagining someone calling him _bitchass_. he only knows one person who calls him bitchass. slowly lifting his gaze up from his drink, his eyes met with a really good looking guy that looked like it was sculpted by the gods. the familiar 3 dotted mole on his cheek, his teasing smile and the dark raven comma hair resembles the guy who he met on tinder. the guy who bothered him. the guy who he finds interestingly funny. 

it was too surreal. minhyun started to laugh at his drunk state. 

"what are you laughing at?" seongwoo asks, eyebrows furrowed.

"am i that drunk? the hell." minhyun laughs even more as he hold his stomach. 

"wow. how can a laugh sound so angelic?" seongwoo comments, an amused smile plastered on his lips. "anyway, happy birthday minhyun. thanks for blocking me and making me miserable. you're lucky you're handsome, and even more handsome up close"

minhyun stops laughing and stares at seongwoo. trying to assess if the guy in front of him was real. realizing that minhyun was trying to identify if he was real, seongwoo softly patted minhyun's cheek, rather affectionately. "you're not drunk, you idiot"

minhyun snapping from his reverie and realizing it was really _real_ , he pushed seongwoo's hand away from his cheek as his expression turns stoic.

"ah, you look even cuter when you act all so cold" seongwoo coos. minhyun ignores him by ordering another drink. where are his friends anyway? and more importantly, how did seongwoo find out about his birthday and current whereabouts. "no drink for me?" seongwoo pouts.

minhyun glares at the man beside him. "what are you doing here?"

"minki invited me" seongwoo cheekily smiles. seongwoo calls out the bartender as he orders himself a drink. minhyun scoffs, not even surprised after hearing how minki is involved.

"but i did not invite you." minhyun firmly says. seongwoo suddenly leans close, to close for minhyun's comfort. his breath fanning on his ear. "ah, _daddy_. drop the act and forgive me already." 

minhyun froze up for a second but pushed seongwoo to the side, masking up his face with a disgusted look on his face. "disgusting as always, i see" he sneers. seongwoo laughs and sends out a wink. "i have a gift for you by the way." he announces. minhyun's gaze finally noticed a paper bag sitting on seongwoo's lap. handing minhyun's present. minhyun hesitantly accepts it. 

"you should have not got me one" minhyun mumbles. _i've been a petty bad friend _, minhyun thought. seongwoo snorts and rolls his eyes. "shut up and take it. stop bitching already, i've been miserable for a week because of you."__

"why?" 

"i have no one else to bother and to call daddy" seongwoo explains and starts to drink the bottle of beer in front of him.

minhyun shakes his head, a little smile playing on his lips. seongwoo was really, something. even after finally meeting him personally, he was still beyond humorous. opening seongwoo's gift, his eyes curiously gazed at the the object inside the paper bag. slowly he takes out the gift, with a frown. glancing confusedly at seongwoo, he lifts a questioning brow. "uhm, a toy?"

seongwoo shakes his head disappointingly. "it's not just a toy, it's a birthday rex." 

the green rex dinosaur on minhyun's hand has a party hat on him, and holding out a personalized banner. written on the banner was 'happy birthday daddy." minhyun can't help but burst into laughter while seongwoo watches him with a pleased grin on his face. 

"i could not give you birthday sex, so i gave you a birthday rex instead" seongwoo explains. 

minhyun shakes his head towards seongwoo's absurdity. "thanks, seongwoo. and forgiven" seongwoo's smile widen and yelled out a yes, earning looks from the people near them. 

"can you unblock me now?" seongwoo asks. minhyun shrugs and nods, putting back his birthday rex inside the paper bag. 

as the night continues on, seongwoo was able to catch up with minhyun and was able to meet minhyun's friends. minki and seongwoo were both the wildest of the bunch, making minhyun and the others feel the secondhand embarrassment way too much. minhyun's eyes scanned the rest of his friends, his heart feeling light. without his friends, as cheesy as it sounds, it would not be one of the best birthdays he ever had. include the part that he finally met his interesting friend, ong seongwoo.

********************************************** 

**ong shitwoo**  
happu borthdsy dsdfy

**minhyun**  
im sober and ure not  
goodnight, ong. 

**ong shitwoo**  
m gpnna send udi cc pick ~ ;))))))))))))))))

**minhyun**  
SEONGWOO, NO! 

**ong shitwoo**  
  
hope u loke mi g ift bortdhay botu

**minhyun**  
KAHD  
SJAB  
SHIT  
IM BLOCKING U  
DISGUSTING PIG  


**ong shitwoo**  
HASHASHASASHADFHBAD  
sike ee e ~! rhats`1 not mkne  
mines;; LO N GERTTTTTT ND BOGGERR

**minhyun**  
i regret unblocking u.  
bye. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a late minhyun bday special. onghwang finally met ! and hope this quite long chapter ??? or not, could suffice for the lack of updates. ive been caught up with uni way too much, i apologize once again.
> 
> kudos, comments and votes makes me really happy! thank you for all the love! pls forgive me for this messy chapter, i did not edit it anymore.
> 
> and congratulations to wanna one for their 11th win. aaaa.


	6. g*ng b*ng,

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wherein Seongwoo's friends scare off Minhyun.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> before anything else, i committed a mistake last chapter in including daniel as minhyun's friends. thank you for the people who pointed that out. donghyun is now the replacement of daniel, as minhyun's friend. thank u.

**no fun** \- ong  
**IGNORE** \- jaehwan  
**grandmilf** \- jisung  
**ant man** \- sungwoon  
**japanese snack** \- kenta  
**not really long(gou)** \- yongguk  
**Daaaaamn Daniel** \- daniel  


  


********************************************** 

  


**sausage party** (7) 

  
**IGNORE**  
so I heard u finally got to see the man  
u’ve been talking about nonstop  
grandmilf  
daniel’s not gonna be happy abt this  


**Ant man**  
Did u get laid last night ???????

  


**japanese snack**  
ONG CHONGIE, SPILL.

  


**not really long(gou)**  
Is he good looking as he is on his pics ???

  


**Daaaaamn Daniel**  
? ?? ? ???????????????????????????  
??????????????????  
????????????????????????????

  


**IGNORE**  
Shut up niel  
Ur ass is unloyal anw  
  
**not really long(gou)**  
  
  
**no fun**  
WOAH, HOLD UP U HOES  
First of all, sadly, no we did not  
End up in my room last night  
but we gud now, we back 2 being bros

  


**grandmilf**  
but he’s still straight as a ruler, lol.

  


**Daaaaamn Daniel**  
Yikes  
Sucks 2be u  
  
**Japanese snack**  
Salty ^^^  
  
**ant man**  
^^^^  
  
**not really long(gou)**  
^^^^^

  


**no fun**  
^^^^^^^

  


**IGNORE**  
^^^^^^^^  
  
**grandmilf**  
stop bullying my son

  


**Daaaaamn Daniel**  
i ain’t no son of someone who puts pineapples on  
Pizza

  


**grandmilf**  
Well then ure on ur own  
And im not gonna be a mom to someone who still  
Debates over the pineapples on pizza

  


**IGNORE**  
SUCK ITTT !!!!

 **japanese snack**  
if ure gonna pull each other’s organs  
do it somewhere else not here  
anyway !!! back to the important matter  
ONG  
SEONGWOO  
  
**no fun**  
yes kenta?  
  
**japanese snack**  
how’s minhyun like irl  
  
**IGNORE**  
and yea does he have good looking friends  
that u can hook me up with  
tnx u are my bestest friend ong  
  
**no fun**  
well, he’s as cold as he is on chats  
But whenever he smiles,  
The ice melts  
He’s as radiant as a sun

  


**ant man**  
i'm gonna fucking puke

  


**not really long(gou)**  
uh…….. that’s real sweet, ong  
but it literally damaged me  
  
**Daaaaamn Daniel**  
WHEEZES  
  
**no fun**  
You’re all so mean D:  
I’m just telling the truth  
  
**grandmilf**  
Add him here  
I wanna interrogate  
Meet***  
  
**no fun**  
the hell, what for , jisung hyung???  
and we’re not even dating jfc  
  
**grandmilf**  
i just wanna meet this great friend of yours  
stupid  
  
**japanese snack**  
yes !! add !! him !!  
**ant man**  
GO  
  
**not really long(gou)**  
don’t be a sissy ong  
  
**IGNORE**  
don’t mind the crying d*niel at the back

 **Daaaaamn Daniel**  
who’s crying  
def not me

 **grandmilf**  
On  
ONG  
ONG  
SEONG  
WU  
SONG  
WOO  
WOO  
HONG  
GONG

 **no fun**  
ok ok just pls GOOD TO HIM 

_**no fun** added **minhyun** _

  


**minhyun**  
what's this ?????  
um seong woo ??? 

  
**IGNORE**  
WELCUM  
to the greatest gang bang of the century  
i meant, orgy  


**minhyun**  
IM SCARED.  


**no fun**  
im sorry baby  
these are my friends  
they wanted to meet u  


**minhyun**  
BABY????????  
WHAT ????  
IM OUT  


**japanese snack**  
hey minhyun  
we dont bite  
unlike seongwoo  
**grandmilf**  
hello minhyun,  
pls dont mind jaehwan. this aint an orgy  
so how is seongwoo as a friend? :D  


**minhyun**  
um he's cool. 

**ant man**  
oh man, he really sounds dry.  
**not really long(gou)**  
ong chongie really needs to wet him up already  
**no fun**  
SKAJSKAJS  
SUNGWOON AND GUK  
SHUT UP  


**minhyun**  
im not surprised anymore  
one seongwoo is enough  
but another few seongwoo-like is too much  
goodbye. it was nice meeting yall  
i hope this would be the last  


**Daaaaamn Daniel**  
lol bye.  
stay away from my baby. thanks  


_**minhyun** left the group _

**japanese snack**  
ONG  
PLEASE DROP HIM  
HE RUDE ASF  
I CANT BEE LEAF !!!

 **IGNORE**  
the last he says???  
i think tf not u trickass bitCH

 **grandmilf**  
well that did not go nicely as i thought..........

 **ant man**  
daniel's such a jealous bitch im laughing

 **Daaaamn Daniel**  
im gonna step on u tomorrow istg.

 **not really long(gou)**  
LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOO

 **no fun**  
SHUT UP U UGLIZ  
im talking to minhyun rn  
and u rlly scared tf out of him

 **Daaaamn Daniel**  
lol who cares.

_**no fun** kicked **Daaaamn Daniel** out from the group _

**no fun**  
oooops.

  


********************************************** 

  


**ong shitwoo**  
IM SORRY FOR MY FRIENDS  


**minhyun**  
it's ok.  
how did u end up cloning urself into 6 tho ???  


**ong shitwoo**  
what ???  
OH.  
U BITCH.  
im not that bad !  


**minhyun**  
right  
youre not that bad  
but u are the worse  


**ong shitwoo**  
why  
must  
u  
hurt  
me  
this  
way  


**minhyun**  
im sorry baby  
ugly**  
stupid autocorrect.  


**ong shitwoo**  
  
  
  
  
  


**minhyun**  
shut up  
it was a stupid mistake  
dont get too excited  


**ong shitwoo**  
:(  
anw  
  
i took this awhile ago  
dont i look nice ???? :D  


**minhyun**  
eh, u look...  
ok. 

**ong shitwoo**  
so u still straight or  
are u finally bending over for me???  


**minhyun**  
suddenly i gtg. bye!  


**ong shitwoo**  
hm. i'll take that as a yes then.  
how cute, getting all flustered for me  >////<  


**minhyun**  
CATCH THE BLOCK :) 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yikes !!! this has been as dry as minhyun. im sorry !!!


	7. buzzfeed unsolved and chill.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> this week on buzzfeed unsolved, seongwoo tries to uncover the mystery on minhyun's stubborn ass.

**ong shitwoo**  
hey there demon  
it's me ya boy

**minhyun**  
do i look like a demon to you???  
how offensive 

**ong shitwoo**  
i- wHAT  
you're an angel  
u did not get it do u

**minhyun**  
huh  


**ong shitwoo**  
HOLY  
SHIT  
WHEEZES

**minhyun**  
r u ok  
but  
when were u ever ok though 

**ong shitwoo**  
WHEEZES INTENSIFIES!!!!!!!!!  
i cant believe i like a guy who's been  
living under the cave

**minhyun**  
you mean you like bothering me  
bUT I STILL DONT KNOW WHAT YOURE TALKING ABOUT. 

**ong shitwoo**  
you  
are  
a  
dsigrace  
to  
this  
earth

**minhyun**  
excuse me  
???? 

**ong shitwoo**  
WHEEZES

**minhyun**  
wanna catch the block? :) 

**ong shitwoo**  
no  
ok mister hwang  
you are missing out a lot  
we should buzzfeed unsolved and chill  
now

**minhyun**  
buzzfeed?? no thanks.  
i hate them. 

**ong shitwoo**  
are u one of those ppl who posted  
'why i left buzzfeed'

**minhyun**  
jesus  
no 

**ong shitwoo**  
oh  
anw  
buzzfeed unsolved is an exception  
U. MUST. WATCH. IT. WITH. ME.

**minhyun**  
i could watch it alone 

**ong shitwoo**  
no way jose  
how am i supposed to know if u really watched it

**minhyun**  
you're just making an excuse to spend time with me ;)  
:)* 

**ong shitwoo**  
huh. u suck at flirting  


**minhyun**  
i wasn't flirting, dumbass.  
in your dreams, ong 

**ong shitwoo**  
yea in my dreams  
i actually fucked you on my bed  
tucked* sorry, autocorrect :(

**minhyun**  
WHAT  
OH  
stop blaming autocorrect, u kinky shit 

**ong shitwoo**  
not a chance  
so about the buzzfeed unsolved and chill....

**minhyun**  
no thanks.  
i dont trust u being alone with me, in a room 

**ong shitwoo**  
fine.  
i'll just ask minki your address :D

**minhyun**  
what  
no  
i dont trust u  
ok so maybe we've been talking for a month now  
and we saw each other once  
that was an one time thing  
BUT  
wait  
SEONGWOO  
are u still there  
ARE U FUCKING KIDDING ME. YO????  
WHAT THE FUCK  


  


********************************************** 

 

**minhyun**  
MEANKI.  


**devil**  
um, spell my name properly will ya?

**minhyun**  
did you give seongwoo my address??? 

**devil**  
no you rude ass bitch  
why tf would i do that???

**minhyun**  
because he told me he'll ask u my address  
and then he's not replying anymore 

**devil**  
u sound like a boyfriend now  
geez.  
but listen, he did not come for me  
so shut your worried boyfriend ass now

**minhyun**  
boyfriend, HELL NO.  
bye 

**devil**  
BYE! DONT EVER COME BACK!

********************************************** 

it was past 9pm and minhyun thought it was not possible for seongwoo to fall asleep that early yet he still haven't replied nor left his message on read. he's worried about two things: if his friend is okay or if he's actually on his way to his apartment. he sent a message to seongwoo one more time. it was finally left on read and saw seongwoo was typing. minhyun bit his lip, waiting for the response.

 **ong shitwoo**  
sorry u got all worried  
i'm actually @ my friend's house  
crashing in  
ttyl  
  
minhyun snorted at the word _worried_. he was only worried he might be coming over to his apartment and pop his personal bubble. minhyun was expecting a wave of relief hitting him but there was a tinge of disappointment that he refused to feel.

instead he lets out a fake sigh of relief. he was about to settle down on his bed when his doorbell rang. he frowns, he was not expecting any visitor nor a seongwoo. it could not be his friends because minki's out with dongho to god knows where, jonghyun is busy with being the president of his department's student council and aron's out of the country. 

"who is it?" minhyun questions as he came for the door.

"pizza delivery" a weirdly raspy voice answers.

minhyun was sure he did not remember ordering a pizza when he's about to get ready for bed. as early as it sounds, minhyun has been lacking sleep for a few days already. luckily for him, it's a saturday tomorrow, he can still rest with just the right amount of time and use the remaining time to study.

"sorry, i did not order any p-" minhyun was midway opening his door when he froze upon seeing the pizza delivery guy. it was not a killer, nor his crazy old lady neighbor but it was a much crazier person. on his doorstep was a smirking seongwoo with a box of pizza on his hands and was leaning against the door frame. he practically shoves the box of pizza on minhyun's hands, who was still in shock - looking like he saw a ghost.

seongwoo made himself inside minhyun's apartment. "that would be a watch-buzzfeed-unsolved-with-seongwoo, sir" 

minhyun closes the door while balancing a box of pizza on his other hand. his eyes follow seongwoo's back with utter disbelief. "i did not tell you to come in" 

"and yet, you closed the door. so," seongwoo turns with a mischievous grin.

"your point?" minhyun raises a brow as he heads to his coffee table and places the box of pizza on top. seongwoo shrugs in response as his attention diverts to looking around minhyun's apartment. "seongwoo, what are you even doing here?" minhyun asked in a callous manner, crossing his arms while pinning seongwoo under his gaze who remains to be unaffected with minhyun's behavior.

"uh, to bond with my bestest friend?" seongwoo exclaims, adding a _duh_ at the end and minhyun swore he saw him roll his eyes dramatically at him.

"bestest friend? i thought we've established this already." minhyun groans out and tiredly sits on his couch. "who gave you my address even? and i thought you're crashing into a friend's house?" 

"first, yeah we have established that we are the bestest friends. second, minki gave it to me. and lastly, this is the friend i'm talking about" seongwoo replies nonchalantly. 

"minki ga-" minhyun groans, realizing minki has yet again tricked him. he's starting to get trust issues towards that guy. 

"is it such a bad idea to hang out with me?" seongwoo questions, his tone slightly changing. "yeah" minhyun immediately replies.

"why are you such a tsundere?" 

"i'm not"

"there must be a reason for it"

"no"

"there is"

"no"

"there is"

"no"

"are you sure?"

"yes"

"are you sure?"

"yes"

"watch buzzfeed unsolved with me"

"yes" minhyun's eyes widen upon realizing his mistake. "i mean, no." minhyun groans in frustration. lately, he keeps on getting tricked. he is smarter than getting tricked by two of the most annoying guys he ever met.

"you already said yes, there's no backing out now" seongwoo grins, sitting at the end of the couch, completely putting a distance between them. minhyun may have appreciated that gesture. there's no point of saying no, minhyun thought. seongwoo doesn't take a no for an answer and he was already here. he even brought pizza. minhyun started to consider some things.

seongwoo has became really one of minhyun's greatest friend but he would not want to admit nor admit it to seongwoo. he might have to deal with seongwoo's bragging ass when he does the latter. minhyun averted his gaze to seongwoo who was busy plugging a cord to his phone connecting to his tv.

"i should be getting some sleep but instead i'm stuck with you" minhyun complains, feigning a bored look on his face.

seongwoo snorts as he went to youtube and looks up buzzfeed unsolved. "don't be so stubborn" 

"i was not." minhyun counters.

seongwoo starts up the first episode of buzzfeed unsolved and settles back to the couch. "minki told me you need a break too so i know you want this" 

"i needed one but i prefer sleep, thank you very much" minhyun opposes as he reaches down to the box of pizza, casually grabbing a slice. minhyun was about to take a bite when he saw seongwoo was quietly looking at him, with amusement dancing from his eyes. "what?"

"nothing. you're just really stubborn, it's cute." seongwoo says in a relaxed manner and grabs a slice of pizza as well. 

minhyun almost choked. "shut up and let's just watch this stupid show of yours." minhyun grumbles and slumps back down to the couch. seongwoo hums, his focus now on the tv. 

halfway through watching 5 episodes after of buzzfeed unsolved, the pizza box is empty and minhyun's comments were: _this is stupid_ , _the theories are nonsense_ and _shut up seongwoo_. 

seongwoo tries to stop himself from laughing when he tries to check on minhyun who was now completely engrossed. when seongwoo tries to comment anything, minhyun will completely shush him up. seongwoo silently observes minhyun. minhyun was a puzzle, a stubborn puzzle who is hard to figure out. he does enjoy talking to minhyun, it was nice to have a tsundere friend like him. he may have formed a little crush on minhyun, but he wants to be as stubborn as minhyun, refusing to accept the reality on crushing on his friend.

"stop admiring me, it's creeping me out. i know i'm good looking but, please. you're creepier than these unsolved mysteries" minhyun felt uncomfortable being under seongwoo's gaze. he felt, conscious. he could kill just to know what's going inside seongwoo's mind.

"huh funny because you're an unsolved mystery i'm willing to solve" seongwoo suddenly says, his voice raspy and his gaze never leaving minhyun. minhyun shifted on his seat, he felt his neck heating up. 

"that's disgustingly cringey, shut up man" minhyun tries to humor it out, laughing a forced one as he locks gazes with seongwoo. seongwoo only laughs in return, but his gaze still felt different for minhyun. "so you're really gonna crash in here?"

"i guess, if that's okay with you, stubborn ass" seongwoo shrugs as he tilts his head, waiting for minhyun's response.

minhyun thought for awhile. "i guess, it's fine. as long as you don't-"

"i know. as long as i don't make you pregnant. alright virgin mary" seongwoo laughs.

minhyun playfully punches seongwoo's arm. "fuck off, dude or i'm kicking you out."

seongwoo pouts, rubbing the arm minhyun has punched. "sorry, master." minhyun rolls his eyes and throws a couch pillow on seongwoo's face. seongwoo laughs loudly as minhyun continues to glare at him.

minhyun was starting to rethink if it was a right decision to let seongwoo sleep on his apartment. but it was definitely not a mistake to watch buzzfeed unsolved, and enjoy a box of pizza with his _interesting friend_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello so i badly i want to delete the previous chapter because it was a big **_mess_ **.  
>  i hope yall love buzzfeed unsolved as much as i do, lmao. and hope yall like this chapter, comments and kudos are loved! if there are any errors on this, i apologize because i'm being an irresponsible writer and haven't double checked the errors yet! 
> 
> plus, i've been planning to post a new onghwang fic. it's still on draft but i hope you will all support it and give the same amount of love you have given to matched! thank you!


	8. bromo no homo

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> seongwoo thinks minhyun would not find out about his birthday, but he thought wrong.

minhyun was in the middle of the class when he felt his phone vibrate on his pocket. out of habit, he sneakingly tries to peek at his phone's screen while the professor has his back on the class. his eyes grew wide when he got a notification from seongwoo - on _tinder_. minhyun was swimming in confusion. how can he keep on being oblivious to why the dating app keeps on being installed on his phone without being aware. minhyun tries to dig out his memories if he ever lent or left his phone around the devil, aka minki but the last time they saw each other was during his birthday.

an image of seongwoo deviously grinning at him last night flashes through his mind. it was when seongwoo barged into his apartment last night and harassed him to watch buzzfeed unsolved with him. minhyun remembers how he went to his bathroom for awhile and went back to seongwoo looking suspicious but he decided to shrug it off as seongwoo was always, odd.

minhyun quickly shoved his phone back to his pocket when he saw the professor face the class. he would deal with seongwoo's bullshit later, he decided.

 

 **seongwoo**  
oh??? you're back on tinder???  
am i not enough :^(

**minhyun**  
what the hell seongwoo.  
i know u installed this back when i went to the bathroom  
last night !!! 

**seongwoo**  
idk what ure talking about  
u unloyal hoe  >:(((

**minhyun**  
yknow, if i was one of your professors in theater  
i would fail u  
i ain't falling for your acting skills, sweetie 

**seongwoo**  
oh my beloved prince,  
i don't know what you're talking about,  
please enlighten me

**minhyun**  
prince, yikes!  
what are you supposed to be?  
my talking horse? 

**seongwoo**  
if that means you could ride me,  
then yes :D  
be my guest, my beloved prince

**minhyun**  
i think i'm going to throw up my lunch brb 

**seongwoo**  
i bet ur d ick just got hard at the thought of u riding me ;)

**minhyun**  
uh you're wrong  
that's probably the other way around 

**seongwoo**  
what do you mean  
oh  
me riding u? that's also great  
in fact, i love that idea. let's just stick with that plan then!

**minhyun**  
WHAT THE HECK  
that's not what i meany u idiot  
i meant that u were the one who got hard at the idea smh  
istg it amazes me how ur dirty mind works 

**seongwoo**  
u want a piece of my mind?  
oh sweetie, you have no idea what goes through my mind  
wanna try getting a grasp on it?  
we can make dreams into reality ;)

**minhyun**  
no thanks.  
ur mind is a scary place tbh  
i'd rather stay sane 

**seongwoo**  
ugh you're no fun

 

minhyun rolls his eyes upon reading seongwoo's recent message. minhyun's spending his vacant time on the library and instead of reading his text books, he was occupied by seongwoo's attempt of convincing minhyun to try sexting as he tries not to laugh too loud or else, he can never step inside the library again. 

minhyun curiously clicked on seongwoo's tinder profile and saw he has changed his pictures and bio. minhyun figures seongwoo still uses his tinder account and minhyun felt a tinge of an unexplained bitterness. noticing seongwoo linked his instagram account on his profile, he opted to look through his instagram to distract himself from feeling unusual emotions. his recent post which was taken last night - a picture of a full moon reflecting brightly back. what got his attention was the comments and minhyun felt his eye twitched.

**minhyun**  
when's your birthday 

**seongwoo**  
oh? why so sudden

**minhyun**  
just curious. 

**seongwoo**  
hm well  
4 months ago?

**minhyun**  
liar.

 **seongwoo**  
huh?  
im not???

**minhyun**  
i saw ur recent ig post, dummy  
your friends were wishing you a happy birthday  
on the comments! last! night!  


**seongwoo**  
HWANG MINHYUN  
WERE YOU STALKING ME? :"D  


**minhyun**  
i was not! i saw your ig linked to your tinder profile  
so out of curiosity, i looked through it ok  
BUT ENOUGH ABOUT THAT, WHY DID YOU NOT TELL  
ME IT WAS YOUR BIRTHDAY LAST NIGHT  


**seongwoo**  
icb ive been found out  
but hahahaha  
it was not important tbh

**minhyun**  
not important? i'm actually taking a pity on you.  
u actually spent the remaining hours of your birthday  
watching some unsolved mysteries with me  
that's not appealing at all 

**seongwoo**  
you know,  
spending the night with you  
(not in a sexual way, mind u, i know u want it but  
my parents are strict :c)  
was one of the greatest gift i got  
so don't sweat it

**minhyun**  
im not sure if i'm gonna take you seriously or not  
and i'm cringing so hard, man 

**seongwoo**  
I AM AS WELL  
but my beloved prince, for you  
art thou enough  
you are the greatest gift i've ever received :*

**minhyun**  
i guess i'm gonna throw up the contents i ate since yesterday  
thanks a lot, ong 

**seongwoo**  
ugh u ungrateful ~!@#$%^ &*()!!!

**minhyun**  
:p  
hey btw, are u free later? 

**seongwoo**  
mmm are u taking me out on a date?

**minhyun**  
no. but i'm treating you out for a late birthday celebration  


**seongwoo**  
i'm always free when it comes to you, my beloved prince

**minhyun**  
okay good. see you outside your building?  
my class ends at 4, wbu? 

**seongwoo**  
mine ends at 3. see you my beloved :*  
can't wait for our date!!!

**minhyun**  
it's not a date. we're just two bros hanging out  
no homo, birthday boy. 

**seongwoo**  
if you say so, babe

  
  


* * *

 

 **ong shitwoo**  
the waiter's hot.

**minhyun**  
why the heck are u texting me  
when we're literally facing each other 

**ong shitwoo**  
but i'm shy  >___<  
  


**minhyun**  
.......... 

  
**ong shitwoo**  
hey sajsklas wait why are u leaving  
MINHYUNNIE  
YO  
BABE  
BABY  
IM CRYING  
PEOPLE R LOOKING AT ME  
IM ACTUALLY CRYING U OVERRIPE POTATO  
CUM BAC

**minhyun**  
wait youre actually crying  
wth. now ppl r going 2 think i made u cry.  
i'm not going back there anymore!!! 

**ong shitwoo**  
because u did! made me cry!  
come back here and take responsibility  


**minhyun**  
u sound like i'm having ur baby u dramatic ass  


**ong shitwoo**  
that's because u are ???  
what are u waiting for???  


**minhyun**  
UR NOT IN DRAMA CLASS RN ONG  


**ong shitwoo**  
the food's here u aksjldsk  
do u expect me to finish all of these??  
and pay for it???  
what a sad sad birthday for me...  
i'm so sad... celebrating  
sigh  


**minhyun**  
u know i can see u by the window laughing ur ass off  
and ur not crying anymore  
everyone's looking at u like ur actually crazy  
and the food's not even there yet... 

**ong shitwoo**  
they are?  
oh...  
they are....  
anw just come back imy already :(((  
**ong shitwoo**  
princeu? _not delivered_  
oh shit _not delivered_  


* * *

  
_**no fun** \- ong  
**IGNORE** \- jaehwan  
**grandmilf** \- jisung  
**ant man** \- sungwoon  
**japanese snack** \- kenta  
**not really long(gou)** \- yongguk  
**Daaaaamn Daniel** \- daniel  
_

* * *

**sausage party** (7) 

**no fun**  
OMGOD GUYS KASALKJDLKA  
HSAOS  
CALL 911  


**Daaaaamn Daniel**  
why??!!! what's wrong? r u ok hyung???  
  
**not really long(gou)**  
i dont think he was serious about the 911 thing, daniel...  
  
**Daaaaamn Daniel**  
wdym???? this is not a good thing 2 joke abt !!  
hyung WHATS WRONG  
IM WORRIED  
  
**IGNORE**  
since where r u not worried about him lmao  
  
**Daaaaamn Daniel**  
shut up jaehwan  
  
**ant man**  
i came here for the drama  
sips tea  
  
**japanese snack**  
sip milk instead, so u can grow taller  
  
**grandmilf**  
guys... chill  
or else im gonna expose all ur dirty n kinky asses  
on twitter  
ok  
so anw u were saying seongwoo?  
aren't u on a date with minhyun?  
i meant "just two bros hanging out, no homo" thing?  
  
**Daaaaamn Daniel**  
a date? what? how come idk about this  
  
**ant man**  
bcs u left the grp chat when seongwoo was talking abt it?????  
  
**japanese snack**  
ong: guys minhyun and i-  
daniel: *left the group*  
  
**IGNORE**  
true story bro  
  
**Daaaaamn Daniel**  
........  
  
**grandmilf**  
anw as i was saying,,  
R U STILL ALIVE ONG???  
  
**ant man**  
he prolly choked on minhyun's dick already  
lmao  


**no fun**  
i wish i was but i am not!  
ANW MINHYUN HE WILL BE THE DEATH OF ME 

**japanese snack**  
why is that?  
  
**IGNORE**  
what is he doing ???  


**no fun**  
breathing.  
existing.  
just looking so beautiful  
OMF THE WAY HE LICKS OFF THE WHIPPED CREAM FROM HIS LIPS SLAKJLSA  
HE JUST EXHALED U GUYS  
THAT WAS SO CUTE !!!

 **ant man**  
lmao this loser is whipped  
  
**not really long(gou)**  
you really sound so creepy rn  
if i did not know better  
u sound like ure a sick stalker  


**no fun**  
he's glaring at me now bye i gtg  
legit he's gonna b the death of me !!  
i'll upd8 u guys if we hit it off ;))))  


**IGNORE**  
bye dont come back !!!  
  
**japanese snack**  
u better get it boiiii  
  
**grandmilf**  
hmmm, daniel has been awfully quiet,  
son r u still breathing?  
  
**Daaaaamn Daniel**  
actually call 911 for me thnx  
  
**IGNORE**  
why? dying of jealousy? :DDD  
  
**Daaaaamn Daniel**  
no. bcs i'll be knocking u out in a second  
so u better run for your damn life in  
3  
2  
...  
  
**IGNORE**  
fuCK I CAN HEAR HIS FOOTSTEPS COMING 4 MY DOOR  
CALL 911!! 4 ME KSNAKAKS  
LASKF  
23i4893  
  
**not really long(gou)**  
are we really going to...?  
  
**japanese snack**  
nah, i think they're going 2 be fine  


* * *

_**petty princess** \- minhyun  
**Bow Down Bitches** \- minki  
**$exY B4ndit** \- dongho  
**bugi tonight** \- jonghyun  
**(A)IRON MAN** \- aron  
_

* * *

**Minki's Bitches** (5) 

**Bow Down Bitches**

  
hmmmm i wonder what's this?  
  
**$exY B4ndit**  
the guy looks like minhyun??  
  
**Bow Down Bitches**  
because, it is minhyun, genius  
  
**$exY B4ndit**  
the heck, chill... what crawled up ur ass today??  
  
**Bow Down Bitches**  
your dick.  
  
**(A)IRON MAN**  
IM LEAVING THIS GRP BYE !!!  
  
**bugi tonight**  
HYUNG TAKE ME WT YOU  


**petty princess**  
why are you all so noisy wth 

**Bow Down Bitches**  
back read, lover boy  


**petty princess**  
oh  
OH?  
OH?!?!  
wait isn't that me...?  


**Bow Down Bitches**  
great another genius!  
  
**bugi tonight**  
i just noticed it was seongwoo who posted it!!  
o wow  
  
**Bow Down Bitches**  
oh great we got genius #3 here!  
  
**$exY B4ndit**  
shut up minki  
  
**(A)IRON MAN**  
since when r u and seongwoo going out??  


**petty princess**  
we're not going out! i mean we are,  
but in a platonic way. like we guys always do!  
oh and u follow each other on ig, meanki?? 

**Bow Down Bitches**  
uh yes because we have a PLATONIC relationship  
genius #1  
  
**$exY B4ndit**  
how come u never told us u went on a PLATONIC date?  
  
**(A)IRON MAN**  
im hurt :( u never tell us anything  
one day i'll just find out ure already married with seongwoo  


**petty princess**  
what is there 2 talk about  
there's nothing between us  
i'm straight.  


  
**Bow Down Bitches**  
total bs. and guys  
hey  
im an alien lmao  


**petty princess**  
can someone pls kick him out?? 

**(A)IRON MAN**  
on a contrary, ure the one who deserves to get kicked out  
ure keeping secrets from us now!  
  
**$exY B4ndit**  
minhyun come on, dont be shy  
we wont judge you  
we're all gay here  
ok maybe except for "you"  


**petty princess**  
NO. i hate you all. 

**bugi tonight**  
you dont mean that  
just tell us about the platonic date?  
u were very shy? that's not the minhyun we know!  


**petty princess**  
it was ok. we hang out in a cafe. is all.  
and i was not shy!  
i kicked him in his shin after he took the pic! 

**(A)IRON MAN**  
uh. wipes a tear.  
young love~  
  
**Bow Down Bitches**  
the fuck we need full details abt it not some ugly ass  
"it was ok"  
is seongwoo good to hang out with ??? i mean as a date??  
SPILL U ROTTEN PIECE OF FRUIT  


**petty princess**  
it's not like it was my first time hanging out with him.  
it was, entertaining. 

**$exY B4ndit**  
NOT  
  
**bugi tonight**  
THE  
  
**(A)IRON MAN**  
FIRST  
  
**Bow Down Bitches**  
TIME?!?!??!  


**petty princess**  
yall are so dramatic.  
i'm going to bed now, i'm tired. 

**$exy b4ndit**  
tired??? hmmmmmmmm  
  
**Bow Down Bitches**  
ohhh did Seongwoo tire you out?  


**petty princess**  
yea  
i mean wait that sounded wrong  
HECK WE JUST ATE AND WALKED AND TALKED AT THE PARK OK  
BYE YALL ARE CAUSING ME A HEADACHE

 **(A)IRON MAN**  
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)  
  
  


* * *

  
  
  


**ong shitwoo**  
optimushwang, really...  
pffft

**minhyun**  
are u making fun of my ig username...  
listen, im gonna unfollow u then  


**ong shitwoo**  
i was just kidding babe :(  
dont worry, i realized why it's optimushwang

**minhyun**  
because i like transformers?  
no shit sherlock  


**ong shitwoo**  
no  
because if you were a transformer,  
you'd be a hot-obot, called optimus fine ;)))

**minhyun**  
transformers sweetie, optimus prime sweetie,  
im sorry like a trash like ong disrespected u like this 

**ong shitwoo**  
do u want more, i have more, sweetie

**minhyun**  
no thanks. im going 2 sleep, bye 

**ong shitwoo**  
already?!?!

**minhyun**  
seongwoo... it's 1am already 

**ong shitwoo**  
so? we always talk until the sun rises up

**minhyun**  
i'm already tired. like really tired. 

**ong shitwoo**  
ugh alright :(((  
but where's my gn kiss :***

**minhyun**  
go kiss urself 

**ong shitwoo**  
HOW

**minhyun**  
idk go in front of a mirror and kiss ur reflection?? 

**ong shitwoo**  
hmmmm fair enough :)  
hey minhyun before u go

**minhyun**  
what is it? hurry before my eyes completely shut off 

**ong shitwoo**  
i just wanna say  
thank you so much for today :) i really really really enjoyed it.  
idk if u enjoyed it but i did. it's been awhile since i really enjoyed my birthday  
u made me really happy im gonna cry (maybe im not exaggerating)  
im really lucky to have u as my friend! even all throughout the times ive been nothing  
but a nasty nuisance to you, you've still put up to my kinky ass  
ok im done, soft hour is over kasjkas im embarrassed  
hey minhyun?  
are u still there?  
are u sleeping already  
goodnight then!

**minhyun**  
oh  
im  
idk what to say? but uh, you're welcome ong.  
i'm glad you did have fun, really.  
i did too. now don't let this get into your head goodnight and you better go to sleep too. 

**ong shitwoo**  
im gonna sleep really well then :)  
see you in my dreams, my prince!  
xoxo,  
your horse that u gonna be riding 2nite

**minhyun**  
JFC.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> aaaaaacckkk!! i'm so so so so so sorry for being really really ia. i swear i'm not gonna abandon this but ive been really busy and ive been running out of ideas lately. 
> 
> anw thank you for the 400 kudos, i'll make it up to yall!!!  
> pls dont give up on this mess.
> 
> thanks for all the love :) if you wanna talk to me, feel free to contact me on [twitter](https://twitter.com/euigecn)! even though i'm ia af as well. 
> 
> may onghwang prosper this 2018, happy 2018 sweeties.


End file.
